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The One Thing I Said That Won My Husband’s Heart Back for Keeps
I closed my eyes and clenched my teeth as I was about to speak words into the phone that felt so fake and unnatural to me.
We were not even married yet.
Yet, we were going on four years of the most bipolar and dysfunctional relationship you can imagine. I was exhausted.
I knew we loved each other deep down, but we could not make our relationship work.
I closed my eyes and clenched my teeth as I was about to speak words into the phone that felt so fake and unnatural to me.
We were not even married yet.
Yet, we were going on four years of the most bipolar and dysfunctional relationship you can imagine. I was exhausted.
I knew we loved each other deep down, but we could not make our relationship work. There had been too much lying, distrust, jealousy and brokenness that it felt impossible for us to ever be a normal, happy couple. (If this is you and you are NOT MARRIED yet, click here.)
I was in the habit of protecting myself from him, yet I still loved him so much.
To complicate things ever further, he was living in Georgia and I was back home in Massachusetts raising our son.
Complicated is an understatement.
But I had just finished reading the first three chapters of Emerson Eggerich’s book Love & Respect. Earlier that day it had jumped out at me at the bookstore, seemingly begging me to read it.
This must have been God’s hand at work.
As soon as I opened this book I was hooked.
For the first time in my life, I was reading about a man’s deepest needs, and how they were different than mine.
And in my attempt to show Derek all of these years that I LOVED him, I had completely ignored his enormous need to feel RESPECTED.
It was a simple concept, yet so foreign to me, and my head was spinning as I read example after example of women trying this new language and how it immediately changed their marriage.
I wasn’t sure I bought it, which is why I was clenching my eyes and teeth as I was about to try this experiment in my own relationship.
On a man who had been sending me mixed signals for over a year. Saying he loved me and yet not having the emotional or spiritual maturity to back it up with his actions.
It didn’t matter. I loved him and I could see forever in his eyes. I wanted to make things work.
So through my clenched teeth, I spoke these words into the phone:
“I just want to let you know that I respect your decision to stay there and work- and I trust your judgment.”
I was purposeful to use the word respect, and let him know I trusted him.
Silence.
And then came these words back through the phone:
“WOW!…..Well, your Christmas present just got a lot bigger!”
Ha! So cheesy I know, but I don’t think he even knew how to respond. He was literally scrambling for words!
I was shocked at how quickly I could tell this was unlike anything I had ever learned about relationships. This respect-talk thing WORKED!
For me, this began the journey of letting go.
I stopped trying to control so many things and I started just being the lady, and respecting my man.
Somehow it also helped me to start being more responsive and verbally express trust and gratitude in a way that speaks directly to his heart.
Derek and I have now been married for 11+ years.
He has grown to be a man who I admire, admonish and truly respect more than any other person I know. He loves the Lord, is a great husband and father and is a leader to other men.
Our reconciliation all those years ago, as well as our success and happiness as a couple today, is largely due to the principals of love and respect that God brought to my attention all of those years ago.
If you are struggling with intimacy, cohesion and communication with your man, I understand what that is like, I realize there could be layers upon layers of distrust and hurt.
But sometimes the simplest act of ladylike trust and respect for your husband can cut through layers of built-up walls and give you a fresh start in your marriage.
Try it!
2 Free Resources You Might Love!
Putting Your Man in God’s Hands
A FREE 5-DAY GUIDE TO HELP YOU:
Let go of control and become the woman you’ve always wanted to be.
Have the courage to believe God’s word above your feelings.
Find the blessing of doing less
Cultivate the power of Respect
Learn how to draw up appropriate boundaries in your marriage.
Give a Shape To Your Dream>>
FREE MINI-COURSE
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3 Ways To Monetize Your Squarespace Website in 2020
First of all, if you are using Squarespace to run your business, blog or nonprofit the first thing I want to say is, well done.
THIS ALONE TELLS ME THAT YOU ARE CLASSY, SMART, NO-FRILLS AND POSITIONING YOURSELF FOR SUCCESS.
I’m a Blogger, Author, and Life Coach and I do A LOT of research in within my own niche, and as a Creative Entrepreneur at large.
Like you, I am ever growing and figuring out where my balance lies and where I want to invest more of my time and money.
This balance will look different for each of us, but I can assure you that, based on all of my research and experience, these are the top 3 ways you can use your Squarespace website to generate an income in 2020:
First of all, if you are using Squarespace to run your business, blog or nonprofit the first thing I want to say is, well done.
THIS ALONE TELLS ME THAT YOU ARE CLASSY, SMART, NO-FRILLS AND POSITIONING YOURSELF FOR SUCCESS.
I’m a Blogger, Author, and Life Coach and I do A LOT of research in within my own niche, and as a Creative Entrepreneur at large.
Like you, I am ever growing and figuring out where my balance lies and where I want to invest more of my time and money.
This balance will look different for each of us, but I can assure you that, based on all of my research and experience, these are the top 3 ways you can use your Squarespace website to generate an income in 2020:
1. Ads.
Ads are the most passive method of generating income from your website, and also one of the most common.
Many people use ads as their SOLE source of income from their website- and if that is the case, the name of the game becomes attracting as many visitors to their website as possible.
(This is why there are so many of those skeezy websites trying to masquerade and get you to click on them. Because they get paid by the number of visitors to their website.)
Fortunately most people generating income through ads have more integrity and actually create useful and helpful websites, and draw people there by using social media and strong SEO.
Based on all of my research, the GOLD-STANDARD for putting ads on your website would be an Ad Optimization service such as AdThrive or MediaVine.
(I have no affiliation with these companies).
These two companies take out the guesswork, simplify the process and pay well. Although both of these companies require a certain number of pageviews before you are eligible, I still believe this is the best structure to sustain healthy growth using Ads.
So, at the risk of stating the obvious:
If you want to start making money on your website using Ads, growing your number of pageviews is paramount!
If you are having trouble growing your traffic, I would HIGHLY recommend visiting Carly over at Blogging Like You Mean it. She offers some AMAZING courses to help get your business off the ground. Some of them are even free!
2. Affiliates
Affiliateship has been on the rise BIG TIME over the past year.
When you become an affiliate for someone, you are basically advertising one or more of their products for them (usually by making a recommendation in a blog post or in your newsletter).
You do this by inserting a special link that can be traced back to you, and anytime someone clicks that link and ultimately purchases something, you receive a commission from the sale.
In my opinion, the most ethical way to use affiliates is to ONLY recommend products and services that you have used yourself, and that you can honestly HIGHLY recommend to other people.
And while there are many large affiliateship programs (like Bluehost or Hostinger), that allow you to sign up, browse products and really streamline this whole process- most people I respect and admire agree that: the best way to use affiliates on your website is to contact the companies you want to work with directly.
In other words, if you really love a product and service and want to recommend it, get in touch and see if you can become an affiliate!
The best affiliate partnerships for you are the ones that give you a high percentage and again, that you can honestly recommend.
I have a small handful of products and services I am an affiliate for, and I treasure them because they all offer products and services that I’ve used myself, love so much and am EXCITED to recommend to other people!
PLUS AMAZON!!
I use amazon affiliates as well, because it’s so easy to sign-up and who doesn’t want to recommend something sold on Amazon every once in a while?
Amazon affiliate is a great place to get started if you are new or experimenting with affiliate marketing!
(IMPORTANT NOTE: Amazon will shut down your affiliate account if you include affiliate links in emails. So DO NOT include amazon affiliate links in your newsletter. I know several people who have made this very innocent mistake and been penalized.)
3. Selling Your Own Products.
This is the most fun way to make an income in my opinion!
If you are a creative entrepreneur like me, then creating your own products to sell is the most appealing option of all!
You have a gift, you have something to share, and that is why you are here!
Maybe you are looking for a simple way to create and sell your course or mini-course right within your Squarespace website.
Or maybe you are still trying to Give A Shape To Your Dream.
Maybe you are an artistic, detail-oriented woman looking to expand your ETSY shop into a real online business, or looking to launch your new groundbreaking e-book!
Whatever journey you are on, the beauty is that there are now SO MANY great resources to help you make your dreams a reality!
I wish you the best in your endeavors and in the slow, happy, steady progress of making your dreams come to life!!
Two Resources You Might Love!
Create A Simple Squarepace Course
Give A Shape To Your Dream
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More Helpful Resources
Ad Network Advertising 101
How To Monetize a Squarespace Blog
The First Five Steps to Starting Your Dream Business
Do you have a dream brewing in your heart?
Something you can just picture yourself succeeding at and thriving in?
Everyday I talk to beautiful, smart Christian women who are pouring themselves into someone else’s plan-for-success.
They have their own goals and visions, but just struggle to see how they can make them a reality.
They are often too busy, too stressed, have too little time, too little money, and lack the direction to make their dreams a reality.
This was me for a long time!
Do you have a dream brewing in your heart?
Something you can just picture yourself succeeding at and thriving in?
Everyday I talk to beautiful, smart Christian women who are pouring themselves into someone else’s plan-for-success.
They have their own goals and visions, but just struggle to see how they can make them a reality.
They are often too busy, too stressed, have too little time, too little money, and lack the direction to make their dreams a reality.
This was me for a long time!
I would get so excited about a new program, and follow every single step, until I would lose steam, or realize that this was not really taking me where I wanted to go.
I think we often struggle to realize how adored and uniquely made we are to do our own thing.
There is so much out there calling to us, and it’s SO EASY to get absorbed in following in someone else’s footsteps.
But this isn’t what you were made for and you have more freedom than you realize!
I want to give you 5 steps to help you press in and build a strong foundation for following your dreams.
These are not what you would find in a typical business start-up course, but I truly believe that positioning yourself correctly from the beginning will be what sets the groundwork for keeping your life in balance, and letting you run freely on your own path!
1.Dance at God’s feet.
What I mean by this, is let your real self come out with God!
This is the safest place to let all of your deepest desires and wishes come out. Think of yourself like a little girl with her Daddy who she is able to just talk and dream freely with, with no judgement. Even though she doesn’t say all of the right things, there is still love and adoration in her Daddy’s eyes!
Give yourself permission to be yourself with Jesus.
Tell him what you really dream about. What movies and characters and songs and other people inspire you. Tell him how you picture your life! And don’t be afraid of how it sounds!
Maybe this can come out more freely and fully journaling to him in a notebook!
The point is that you give yourself the permission and time to open up and dream in the safe space with Daddy.
2. Surrender, pray and listen.
After you do the dancing and the dreaming and the getting it all out there- the next step is to quiet your heart, surrender, pray and listen.
Imagine yourself laying those dreams at God’s feet, literally. Surrendering everything you just told him you want, and telling him:
“I trust that you will give me what you want for me. If you want me to have parts of this dream, I will receive them gratefully and gladly, and the parts you don’t I trust that you have something different and better for me. I just want to trust you fully. Help me. I’m laying my dreams at your feet and listening, like a blank page in a book for you to write on.”
This is surrender.
And the way that God speaks most powerfully to us is through his word. So take some time next to read his word, and truly absorb what you think he’s telling you!
Repeat these first to steps DAILY for 30 days, and I promise you will find more peace, direction and clarity than you ever knew you could have!
3. Prioritize from the top down.
I highly doubt that you just have all of the time (and money) in the world to give yourself over fully to a new business or ministry venture. Especially if you are a wife and mommy.
That means that some things need to leave your plate in order to make room for this new pursuit.
And here is the most prudent and important advice I can give you:
Do not steal time away from your children, your husband or your relationship with God.
Those priorities need to remain a permanent fixture no matter what you take on- ESPECIALLY if you want God’s blessing over you life, your health and your pursuits. Because he has a way of slowing us down and letting us know when our priorities are out of whack (trust me, I know!)
Time spent on social media, your phone and television should be the first things that get cut! Fruitless, busy activities and time wasted on aimless and unhealthy relationships also.
If you want to do this well, cut the fat out of your life and start taking small steps that fit within the realities of your budget and your home life.
4. Invite Others In!
We need a community. We are the body of Christ and to each member he has assigned different gifts and roles, so we can all function together as something much bigger than ourselves.
Don’t try to be a one-woman show.
Reach out and talk to your pastor’s wife and other sisters in Christ about what your dreams and plans are.
I’m not sure what the end result for you will be, but God has a way of bringing us together and uniting us in purpose and cause.
Don’t hide!
5. Letting it go and moving it forward.
This is a balance. A dance of sorts.
We must continually surrender all of our dreams and motives to God, and sometimes there is a season for standing still and waiting to hear your next move.
But if you feel that God is leading you to move forward, do so prayerfully and resist the urge to plan out your entire future.
Sometimes God will give you just enough light for the step you’re on.
Step forward in faith.
And in all of this I can tell you this:
The best and most beautiful things are found in the intimacy with Jesus. If you think you are going to find an identity or sense of importance in your work, it will disappoint you.
The close places where your heart is fully understood and you are fully loved, that is where it’s at. No other person, or no amount of success can give you anything that good- and once you have that, everything else is just a bonus!
Two Course You Might Love!
How To Start Your Dream Business >>>
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Build A Simple Online Course In Squarespace >>>
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How To Win Your Husband's Heart Back & Have A Fresh Start In Your Marriage
How would it feel to have a fresh start in your marriage?
A blank canvas! Can you even imagine it?
Some of us have forgotten that deep longing we use to have for a deep and beautiful love story.
The magic is gone and all that is left is disappointment.
Pent-up frustrations and anger win each day as the needle on the “love-meter” moves further and further into the negative. Sometimes it has been stuck in the negative for so long that things just feel hopeless.
I remember living that way and it is EXHAUSTING.
But during some of the hardest and messiest times, God started to open my eyes, and strip away everything that I thought I knew about my relationship with my man.
And the things that He showed me ushered in an entirely fresh start for us!
How would it feel to have a fresh start in your marriage?
A blank canvas! Can you even imagine it?
Some of us have forgotten that deep longing we use to have for a deep and beautiful love story.
The magic is gone and all that is left is disappointment.
Pent-up frustrations and anger win each day as the needle on the “love-meter” moves further and further into the negative. Sometimes it has been stuck in the negative for so long that things just feel hopeless.
I remember living that way and it is EXHAUSTING.
But during some of the hardest and messiest times, God started to open my eyes, and strip away everything that I thought I knew about my relationship with my man.
And the things that He showed me ushered in an entirely fresh start for us!
So I am here to tell you that you can start over- and to help you find the winning game plan for your new start!
But first I want to tell you this:
When I am counseling a woman, nothing spells trouble more than if she is telling me all of the hurtful and awful thing her spouse does, but refuses to talk about her own mistakes or what she could be doing better.
Humility.
In a nutshell, I believe that humility is the key ingredient to a healthy marriage that will last.
And it often only takes ONE spouse to focus on what they can be doing better, rather than on what their spouse should be doing better. The willingness to try something better and wiser, and patiently wait for a change.
(Let me pause right here and say that I AM not talking about instances of abuse. If you are in an abusive relationship please read this disclaimer.)
Right now, I’m calling on you to step up and be the bigger person in your marriage.
I’m calling on you, to ask God for help.
And from my own experience of a MIRACULOUS transformation in my own relationship, and from counseling dozens of women, here is what I believe is your winning game plan:
1. Let the natural attraction take back over. Forget the rest.
Chances are good that your relationship with your husband has become complicated.
All of the times he has let you down, caused you pain, or not prioritized the right thing is like another knot in a messy ball of string. And by now that ball of string has become so twisted and knotted, it seems impossible to untangle or unwind.
He knows this. He knows he has let you down beyond repair and undoing that knot feels impossible.
Many women hold this over their husband’s head and make him feel as though he is responsible for un-doing the knot, rebuilding trust and making things right. This drains the life right out of him and makes him feel like he starts every day in the negative- like a HUGE debt hanging over his head.
Men thrive on feeling like a hero to their woman- THAT is what gives him energy.
And when he feels like a failure, he will lose the motivation to rise up and prove himself, because he knows that you DO NOT see him as a hero, but only as someone who has let you down and hurt you.
The question is no longer about whether or not he deserves this, and what he did- but my question to you now is: do you want your marriage to be good, and do you want it to last?
If so, you need to give him a clean slate. You must cut up that ball of string and throw it away. Only you can do this because you are the one who is holding it.
(If this all sounds impossible, please hold on until step 2.)
But, right now I want to ask you:
Do you first remember what attracted you to your husband?
How maybe you couldn’t keep your hands off each other when you were first falling in love?
I’ve heard it said that the enemy does everything he can do get a couple to be intimate before they are married, and then everything he can to keep them apart after they are married.
It’s so true!
You better believe that they enemy is doing everything in his power to turn you and your husband away from eachother and keep you from being intimate.
(To see this concept illustrated better, watch the movie War Room! It is a beautiful and inspiring story of a woman who finally realizes she is fighting the enemy in her marriage, not her husband.)
So what I’m asking you to do is this:
Cut that ball of string up and throw it away!!!!!!!!!
Instead of making your husband “earn” your attraction, your love and your trust- just start giving those things to him freely on a daily basis.
Ask God for the strength to give your husband a clean slate even tonight when he walks through the door.
See him through the eyes of a woman who is madly in love with him.
Laugh with him, flirt with him- keep it light. Make love to him, then kiss him, thank him, smile at him and fall asleep.
This might sound silly but sometimes, while my husband is at work, I like to go into his closet, stick my face into all of his shirts and just breathe in his scent. I know that’s ridiculous, but I LOVE how my man smells. It is the same scent as back when we were initially falling in love and it is always something about him that just DOES IT for me! It cuts through all of the complicated thoughts, and just makes me feel like a woman in love with her man.
And I want my marriage to be simple, natural and playful in that way: just a woman in love with her man.
Do you have the courage to let go of all of the score cards and everything else and just be a woman in love with her man?
2. Replace whatever is sitting on the thrown of your heart with JESUS♥️
Jesus is the only man worthy to sit on the throne of your heart.
And when you are not spending time DAILY with him, something or someone else (or multiple somethings or someones) will become your God; your source of security, sustenance and happiness.
Maybe you don’t realize that you have made your spouse responsible for your happiness, instead of Christ.
This is one of the easiest and most common mistakes I see in marriages.
If this resonates with you, I have created a wonderful free resource called: Putting Your Man In God’s Hands, that I think will help you tremendously!
The bottom line is that rather than trying to control your man, it is TIME to release him into God’s hands, pray for him fervently, and watch God be the one to transform his HEART (rather than just his behavior.
Here is a scripture I prayed over my husband for years:
“For this reason I bow my knees before the Father, from whom every family in heaven and on earth is named, that according to the riches of his glory he may grant you to be strengthened with power through his Spirit in your inner being, so that Christ may dwell in your hearts through faith--that you, being rooted and grounded in love, may have strength to comprehend with all the saints what is the breadth and length and height and depth, and to know the love of Christ that surpasses knowledge, that you may be filled with all the fullness of God.”- Ephesians 3:14-19
Prayer is SO powerful that I have literally watched these specific transformations in my husband take place before my eyes:
My husband’s spirit, mind and body have strengthened tremendously.
His reputation, position and favor with people has increased every year.
He is able to interact with other people based in love and care for the right things, rather than greed, shallowness, pride or perversion like his old self.
And lastly, he, more than ANYONE I know, can see the bigger picture and see other people’s intentions for what they are. I feel God has truly helped him to comprehend “with all the saints, what is the breadth and length and height and depth”- and is increasingly filling him “with the fullness of God.”
Prayer works better than anything else we could ever do for our husband.
If you are new to this, this a great book to help you pray for your man!
Let your daily time with Jesus be your primary place to vent, repent, say the deepest things of your heart, release all of your feelings and anger, and WATCH the transformation in your heart and marriage that takes place!
3. Be the lady.
It is so simple, and yet we try to be so much more.
What a relief for those of us who are use to always doing more, always trying harder and always trying to figure everything else.
You are not called to be the husband, the man, the leader and the one who figures everything out.
All you have to do is be the lady.
It’s simpler, lighter and more freeing than you can imagine.
But it is a learned art, for sure.
The best way we can begin to be the lady of our home is to start showing respect to our man verbally and with our actions. Nothing will make him want to step up as the man more than this.
But again, this does not come naturally, so if you are not sure where to start please check out this article here!
Respect was the biggest catalyst in shifting my own relationship.
Whenever it feels like your marriage is struggling or not where it should be, these three steps are an excellent reset button to get your heart, your mind and your marriage back on the right track.
Do them purposefully and consistently, and WATCH how it completely changes the nature of your marriage!!
Two Free things You Might Love!
Putting Your Man in God’s Hands
A 5-DAY GUIDE TO HELP YOU
Let go of control and become the woman you’ve always wanted to be.
Have the courage to believe God’s word above your feelings.
Find the blessing of doing less
Cultivate the power of Respect
Learn how to draw up appropriate boundaries in your marriage.
How To Start Your Dream Business
FREE COURSE!
Pin this for later!
The Bright Side of Staying Home: 3 Ways The Quarantine Has Been A Blessing
As we are all in this hunkered-down state, I can’t help but feel a certain sense of peace about how all of this is happening.
As believers in Christ, we are already attuned to the fact that God is in control no matter what. Not that fear or disappointment never creeps in for us, but the “peace that passes understanding” is real, and at times like this we can see that distinct mark.
I was talking to a friend the other day and we both echoed back what the other was feeling: This has brought about a lot of GOOD things. It has helped us to re-focus on things that REALLY MATTER.
Again, I am not blind to the tragedy. But I want to point out a few of the REALLY GOOD things taking place because of the restrictions this virus has enforced:
DISCLAIMER:
I am not in any way trying to downplay the tragedies occurring due to this virus. The purpose of this article is to bring light to some of the good things happening because we are forced to stay at home. If you think this material will offend you, please don’t proceed.
As we are all in this hunkered-down state, I can’t help but feel a certain sense of peace about how all of this is happening.
As believers in Christ, we are already attuned to the fact that God is in control no matter what. Not that fear or disappointment never creeps in for us, but the “peace that passes understanding” is real, and at times like this we can see that distinct mark.
I was talking to a friend the other day and we both echoed back what the other was feeling: This has brought about a lot of GOOD things. It has helped us to re-focus on things that REALLY MATTER.
Again, I am not blind to the tragedy. But I want to point out a few of the REALLY GOOD things taking place because of the restrictions this virus has enforced:
1. It has made us realize the state that our family is REALLY in.
When you are all stuck together under one roof for this many days, there is really no hiding what the issues are.
The lack of harmony amongst siblings is suddenly obvious.
The little annoyances are “annoying-er”.
The angry temper on that child is sticking out like a soar thumb.
Issues in our own hearts and marriages that were easy to distract ourselves from are suddenly brought front and center.
Many people are realizing they can’t stand their own family! It’s sad.
Rather than schools, jobs and activities holding everything in place, Mom and Dad must now create a schedule for the family that is healthy and balanced- when really, this is probably something we should have been doing all along.
Personally, I have realized A LOT during this time about what I want on my family’s schedule, and what I don’t. For some reason, this time has just made that more clear.
It has also made me want to be better, and more in-tune as a mom.
Our families (spouse and children) should come second only to God- yet many of us have lost touch with connecting and stewarding the most important responsibilities and relationships He has given us.
We have become too busy and our minds have been on other things.
My prayer is that this time would be a wake-up call.
That instead of finding other distractions (like alcohol, social media or entertainment) to get us through- that we would fully let all of this sink in. That through realization, repentance and realignment - we would begin fresh, with a new vision for stewarding our family and our time.
We’ve needed this!
And I pray that we would be courages enough to make the changes we feel God leading us to make.
2. It is forcing us to take a real rest.
For several years now I’ve been something of a minimalist.
My family has made it a practice to say “no” to most opportunities and invitations that come our way, so we can do a good job at the few things that matter and maintain a schedule that allows for regular restful time at home. (We have 4 kids, so I use the word restful loosely.)
But EVEN STILL, this new level of “nothingness” happening right now, has made me realize how much we have TRULY needed THIS kind of rest.
I feel we have all needed a real rest and God is giving it to us.
Did you know that before the Israelites entered the promise land, they were told that every 7 years, they were not to plant any crops so even the land had a chance to rest and replenish itself? And all debts incurred by the poor were to be forgiven on the seventh year as well?
We live in such a fast-pace, get-ahead time, that these kinds of socioeconomic practices are unthinkable!!
We don’t even honor the Sabbath Day, let alone a Sabbath Year!
And as believers we need to WAKE UP to the fact that rest and Sabbath are no longer a given. They are something we must purpose and make space for. (Even youth sports have crept over into Sundays.)
God has blessed us right now with this cushion of rest, and I pray that this time would not only help us REMEMBER how to be together- but also how to REST together!!
And that we would LOVE it and crave after it so much that we would reinstate the idea of a weekly Sabbath, as well as longer periods of REAL rest.
3. It is encouraging us to re-think our children’s education.
One of my children had just recently begun having a really tough time with school. There was tension with a couple of his peers among other things, and being that his class is very small and generally tight-nit, he was definitely feeling it.
At 16-years-old, for the first time ever, I watched him begin to loathe going to school. I could also see how these changes began effecting his health. He is normally a very upbeat and happy kid, who suddenly became tired, overwhelmed and stressed much of the time.
I had been praying for about two weeks for God’s hand to be on my family and my son, to get through the end of school. Three months felt like forever in an environment that suddenly felt toxic for him.
I can’t even describe the relief he has experienced and the weight I have watched come off of his shoulders, now getting to do school from home.
I have been talking to some other moms who are tuning into their children’s education for the very first time.
It can be scary to see the gaps and short-comings because we know we are ultimately responsible for their education and we don’t want to let them down. Tuning in is a GREAT thing.
When our children are at school all day it is easy to assume that things are going generally well, and that they are learning everything they need to know. But that is often not the case.
Teachers are human beings too, and just like within any other profession, there are some who are EXCEPTIONAL at what they do, but many who are just skating by. Add on top of this unbalanced policies, and dysfunctional behaviors of other students, and it is no wonder so many children come home stressed, anxious or just completely drained after school.
Many schools and teachers are WONDERFUL, for sure! But this has definitely become more the exception than the rule.
I have found myself praying many times over the last several weeks for the hearts of mothers and fathers to tune in to their children. I’ve also prayed for some parents to realize that homeschooling really is possible and to desire it.
Over the last several months God has shifted mine and my husband’s heart tremendously in this area, and we are now planning to homeschool our children next year.
I know this is not feasible for everyone- but I hope that the involvement and stepping into the role of primary-educator will stick for parents, regardless of what their children do for schooling next year.
I hope your family is finding peace, joy, provision and togetherness in this time!
2 Great Courses You Might Love!
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How I Created my Course on Squarespace at No Additional Cost
Are you wondering if it’s possible to create your course on your Squarepace website at no additional cost?
The short answer is: yes!
(Find out how you can do the same, here. Or keep reading to see how I did it!)
First of all: If you are using Squarespace to run your business, blog or nonprofit the first thing I want to say is, well done.
This alone tells me that you are classy, smart, no-frills and positioning yourself for success.
Are you wondering if it’s possible to create your course on your Squarepace website at no additional cost?
The short answer is: yes!
(Find out how you can do the same, here. Or keep reading to see how I did it!)
First of all: If you are using Squarespace to run your business, blog or nonprofit the first thing I want to say is, well done.
This alone tells me that you are classy, smart, no-frills and positioning yourself for success.
At the start of my own journey, I had so many people telling me to go with WordPress: the highly-customizable, been-around-the-block, everyone-uses-it option. I had experience building two websites using WordPress in the past, and both times found it extremely time-consuming, clunky and like it was all up to me to make it look good.
When I started RealStrong, my sister advised me to go with Squarespace and I’m SO GLAD I listened. I had a beautiful website up and running in a matter of days, and I haven’t looked back since!
If you’re not already familiar with my blog, welcome! My name is Audry Cece and I am all about helping thoughtful women create brilliant and purposeful lives centered around God and their family.
I love diving into the deep end with women and getting honest about what matters most: our mental and spiritual health, love lives, our sexuality, our children and more!
But today we are talking about a different area of importance: your work.
Whatever it is that you’re doing, I hope that you LOVE it and feel clear about your calling.
my passion and desire to teach is what sent me searching for a guide on How to Create A Squarespace Course at No Additional Cost.
The problem? I couldn’t find one!
(I found one course for around $200 that still required me to purchase and learn additional software- no thank you!)
So after absorbing dozens of YouTube videos, Squarespace forums and blog posts about the topic, I was able to piece together any easy system that allowed me to create the beautiful and simple course I was looking to create for my clients. SCORE!
I absolutely LOVE the ease at which I can now make new courses that are on-brand, FUN to create, and help serve my clients in a way that a book, e-book or blog post just couldn’t do. It’s an all-around WIN!
And since this kind of course did not exist, I actually decided to make my system into a course and sell it for super cheap!
Otherwise, here is what I can tell you from experience:
1.I saw the need, and then clarified and organized my message.
If this is not already obvious, you don’t want to create a course just for the sake of creating a course.
You must stay in the wheelhouse of your expertise, and fill a need that is unique to your clientele. You probably don’t need me to tell you this.
But what might not be so obvious, is how to organize this information and put it into “course form.”
In the method I use for creating your courses on Squarespace, each lesson is within the framework of a Blog Post.
So, I simply title each lesson, write out the content, add in any videos or images for that particular lesson, and add in the buttons that build the framework to my course. Simple as that.
I am then sure to go back over several times to clean it up, edit and add in any links where I need them.
2. I useD what is already available inside of Squarespace, as well as some other free programs like Canva, Loom and Unsplash.
There are so many easy-to-use and free options available to add design, color, texture and video to your online course!
I am a bargain-hunter who doesn’t like to pay for anything additional unless I absolutely HAVE TO!
That is why I didn’t want to have to buy an additional program, like Teachable, that would add another monthly expense and force me to learn an entirely new program.
I am here to tell you that IT IS entirely possible to create your paid or free course inside of Squarespace using what you already use for free!
3. When I got stuck, I used forums, YouTube Videos, and Upwork if I needed to outsource anything.
When in comes to tech and website-building, I would say Maria Forleo’s assesment is pretty darn correct that, “Everything is figuroutable.”
It may take time or a little bit of extra money if you need to outsource something, but if you know what you are looking to do, you can keep moving ahead bit by bit, even when you run into some snags.
Most of us are use to plowing forward in this way and it’s how we have gotten to where we are.
So don’t loose heart! If you are determined to build your course on Squarespace, I assure you that it can be done with a little time and effort.
And if you would like to get the simple formula I use for creating my courses and mini-courses on Squarespace, you can find that right here!
How To Create a Simple Course On Squarespace
Signs You Were a Parentified Daughter, And How it Can Show Up in Your Marriage
Parentification happens when a child takes on the role of caretaker in place of the parent.
They may be responsible for the care of themselves, their siblings and/or a parent.
Instead of being loved, nurtured and cared for, the child must sacrifice their own needs to meet the needs of others. This often happens without the child even realizing it, as it just becomes the everyday norm.
Parentification happens when a child takes on the role of caretaker in place of the parent.
They may be responsible for the care of themselves, their siblings and/or a parent.
Instead of being loved, nurtured and cared for, the child must sacrifice their own needs to meet the needs of others. This often happens without the child even realizing it, as it just becomes the everyday norm.
As an adult, the following symptoms can emerge:
You spend a great deal of your time caring for others
Low self-esteem
Background sense of shame
Always in the role of emotional caretaker
Seldom get your own needs met
Are always alert about acting in ways that please others
Conform to other peoples’ wishes and desires
Feel unreasonably responsible for other peoples’ feelings, care and welfare
You are self-deprecating
You are quick to maintain harmony and sooth other peoples’ feelings
Don’t feel you have value unless you are giving to others
Does this sound like you?
If so, here are some common ways that these symptoms can spill over into your marriage:
Always apologizing
Find it hard to ask your spouse for help or a favor- you try to just do it yourself
Forgo altercation or confrontation for the sake of keeping harmony
Low body esteem- not wanting your spouse to see you naked
Picking out your flaws- driving your spouse crazy with self-criticism
When there is an altercation, you often feel it was your fault and fixate on what you could have done differently
Forgetful that your spouse is a fault-prone human as well
Not feeling secure in your marriage, but like it is based on your performance
Don’t feel you have value unless you are giving to others
Why do we turn out this way?
You would almost be tempted to think that a child with a lot of responsibility would grow up to be mature and highly competent (and we are in many ways). But it comes at a great price. Because we did not have adequate nurturing and guidance, there are many important social and emotional milestones that were never reached.
Furthermore, we get so used to “playing” adult, that we grow up with a hidden sense of shame. Like the little girl hiding inside of us just might be discovered. (For more on the inner-child, check out this article: How Your Broken Family-of-Origin is Affecting Your Marriage, And How to Begin Healing)
How this can make us feel toward our spouse
As I began to uncover the traces of this hidden baggage I had been unknowingly carrying around through my adult life, my first feelings toward my husband were anger and suspicion. Had he been taking advantage of my caregiving, people-pleasing nature all of these years? Was I being duped?
I thought, “If I am really like this and he is not, then surely the scale has been tipped in his favor this whole time.”
The enemy is ALWAYS after our thought-process toward our husband, isn’t he?
My husband is not a perfect man, but he is my partner in life and the father of my four children. I know his intentions toward me are not malicious or fowl, despite what I might feel sometimes. Furthermore, I can get so fixated on my own perceptions that I forget that I have already given my life fully over to a heavenly father who loves and promises to look out for me. My well-being is in HIS hands and I trust him.
I’m sorry.
If you were a parentified daughter, I just want to say I’m so sorry. I’m sorry that you weren’t given a full and beautiful childhood with two parents who cared deeply for your needs, as parents are supposed to.
I’m sure that every part of your childhood was not bad- but there were definitely some important areas in which you were neglected and hurt. Again, I’m so sorry this happened to you.
If you are looking for a good starting point for opening up and dealing with some issues from your childhood, I just released a free 7-day email course you can check out below.
I hope you will find this helpful in your healing journey!
Healing Your ♥ When Your Family of Origin was Broken by Divorce
A FREE 7-DAY E-MAIL COURSE TO HELP YOU:
Identify deeply-rooted issues from your broken past
Find peace and trust as you allow God to surface these issues
Continually walk toward a full healing
Flourish in your marriage and home
Step out of old, ingrained thought-patterns and into the woman you were created to be!
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3 Healthy Boundaries for Adult Women- To Protect Your Own Sanity and Family
We’ve each grown up with different dynamics within our family of origin- and these relationships can be complicated, to say the least.
Many of us came from broken or dysfunctional homes where nobody modeled healthy relationships and boundaries. Some of us even grew accustomed to accepting extremely unhealthy behavior as normal.
I often hear from women about their parents’ unbearable behaviors. Sometimes these adult daughters did not even realize the issue until well into their adult years.
**I have edited this article after realizing my own personal boundaries have been more to protect me from certain dysfunctional dynamics in my extended family circle- not for my own parents or grandparents, all of whom I am very close with. I hope these words help you feel empowered to put up boundaries with those who do not have your best interest at heart- but to be gracious with those who truly love you.
We’ve each grown up with different dynamics within our family of origin- and these relationships can be complicated, to say the least.
Some of us came from broken or dysfunctional homes and even grew accustomed to accepting extremely unhealthy behavior as normal.
I often hear from women about issues within their own families they didn’t even recognize until well into their adult years:
narcissism
need to dominate
always playing the victim
manipulation, just to name a few
At some point, we all have to come to the realization that our parents, grandparents, aunts and uncles are flawed humans just like everyone else. They have hurts from their own upbringing and reasons they behave the way they do, just like us.
I’m not giving anyone a pass for egregious behavior. But the fact of the matter is that we don’t have much power to truly change anyone.
This is why boundaries are not about shaming and blaming- they are about you taking responsibility for yourself.
Boundaries are about setting the climate in your life so you have the freedom to live out the priorities God shows you.
They are essentially your way of saying to other people:
“I realize what your preference for our relationship would be. But it’s not the same as mine. Here is what I am willing to give, receive and tolerate in our relationship. Wherever that overlaps with your preferences for our relationship, great! We can meet there!”
Having healthy relationships with other people has a lot to do with knowing your boundaries and respecting theirs.
Here are three areas I believe it’s very important to know and stick to your boundaries:
Phone/Text Boundaries
It can be a hard thing that we are all available now 24/7 now via our cellphones. Not that we have to answer every phone call or reply to every text message, but often just seeing a certain name come up on our screen is enough to cause significant stress.
Here is what I suggest:
Lower the bar. Don’t rush to get back to people. Text messages don’t need to be responded to right away, nor do phone-calls. I often answer all of my text messages from the day in one shot in the evening or even the next morning. Sometimes I just forget and that’s okay too. Everyone lives and everyone will be fine. Do yourself a favor and lower the bar.
If you don’t wish to engage with someone via text, you don’t have to. Give extremely short, finalizing answers back on your own timetable.
If someone calls you often to unload all of their problems, and it’s beginning to feel like an infringement, have the hard conversation to tell them you don’t have the time any longer. Hard conversations are more than worth the relief they bring of no longer having to deal with obnoxious behavior. Remember not to blame, be polite and make it about you and your preferences. Again, a hard conversation is worth it and also can save you from “snapping” at the person later down the line.
Get-together Boundaries
Most of us have the pressure of expectations when it comes to holidays and get-togethers. Now that you are an adult with your own family, you DO have a say in this too! I know this might come as a shocker, but you don’t have to do Christmas the way that your family has always done it.
I see so many couples rushing around on holidays, trying to keep both sides of the family happy and it can get so ridiculous, to the point where they don’t even get to enjoy the holiday or spend time with their own family. YOU ARE YOUR OWN FAMILY NOW. You and your husband get to decide what YOUR FAMILY would like to do for Christmas now.
If you feel overwhelmed by or pressured into too many get-togethers, this article could be extremely helpful: Permission to Say No to Everything.
Open Door or Not Boundaries
Some people are fine with having anyone stop by at any time. I’m not one of them. I don’t mind if my parents, grandparents, or siblings stop by unannounced, but I once had to have a hard conversation with someone that went like this:
“Hey, could you please call or text before you plan on coming by just to make sure it’s a good time? I’m in a very busy season of life right now and it’s just not always a good time for a visitor.”
This person had been stopping by unannounced about once a month, but it just did not feel right. It didn’t feel like love, it felt like snooping and control.
So I had to have a hard conversation, again, not putting blame on them, but just letting them know what works for me.
It was received well and the conversation served its purpose in drawing up a new boundary that works for me. And it is a relief to not worry about that person not popping by anymore!
Remember, it is about being vocal about your preferences in a way that lets people know what works for you. In most cases, people will be respectful of what you have asked.
I’ve noticed that many women who struggle with boundaries are those of us who grew up in broken families of origin.
If this is you, I would highly recommend my new 7-day e-course below!
Also, if you need more in-depth teaching on this topic, I highly recommend Boundaries: when to say yes, how to say no to take control of your life.
I hope you feel better equipped to set up some God-honoring boundaries in your life!
Healing Your ♥ When Your Family of Origin was Broken by Divorce
A FREE 7-DAY E-MAIL COURSE TO HELP YOU:
Identify deeply-rooted issues from your broken past
Find peace and trust as you allow God to surface these issues
Continually walk toward a full healing
Flourish in your marriage and home
Step out of old, ingrained thought-patterns and into the woman you were created to be!
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Why Rachel Hollis' Message is So Hard to Resist, And How to Rise Above
Even though my life is so blessed, and God has been so gracious to me, I am still such a loser sometimes.
Tonight I sat on my couch scrolling through my phone on a Saturday night, ignoring my family. A temporary ease to the dull ache inside of me.
I try to keep it pure and look up only Christian content, but you know how things can spiral.
Christian celebrity Instagram accounts, and then onto the people they have tagged, and people those people have tagged... A lame, lame waste of time, I know. And tonight I somehow eventually wound up on a famous Christian authors’ daughter’s account. Nice.
Even though my life is so blessed, and God has been so gracious to me, I am still such a loser sometimes.
Tonight I sat on my couch scrolling through my phone on a Saturday night, ignoring my family. A temporary ease to the dull ache inside of me.
I try to keep it pure and look up only Christian content, but you know how things can spiral.
Christian celebrity Instagram accounts, and then onto the people they have tagged, and people those people have tagged... A lame, lame waste of time, I know. And tonight I somehow eventually wound up on a famous Christian authors’ daughter’s account. Nice.
In my heart, I know a lot of what I’m seeing is an act.
I know how people advertise and social climb; color coordinate their pages and post pictures from photo-shoots done months in advance as if it were today. It feels like a twisted game, but sometime I can’t stop looking and can’t help the feelings that rise up inside of me.
This young woman, in perfectly stunning poses, talks about how her husband flew with her out to CO several times in the proceeding year so she could “take time to heal.” I picture them sitting on the balcony of some isolated mountain-top resort in bathrobes with cups of coffee talking through all of the hurts she has been through. Sounds nice. Then maybe they would have an extended spa-day and go to see some renowned Christian-therapist and talk about some lifestyle changes and a healing regiment. Go for long walks with no make-up and the perfect-top knot in high- waisted leggings (really, Audry? Because you’re 36 with 4 kids…) And I will still be here, with my mommy-pooch that would certainly not look good in high-waisted leggings, trying to afford a beach weekend, three hours away with my family. Trying to shake the feelings that I am missing out on being noticed, appreciated or having my own time in the Rocky Mountains to “heal”.
And I will try not to go upstairs and compare my own husband who is upset with me because I’ve been flaking out on my phone for the past hour, to this husband who took his wife to CO three times last year to help her “heal”. And these are the kinds of things that we can so often feel as mothers and wives and Christian women trying to make our way in this culture.
And then Rachel Hollis comes along.
And she tells us that we have to stop waiting for other people to notice or take care of us, and we need to start pushing forward, making ourselves a priority and going after our dreams and taking care of ourselves. She hands us an ice-cold glass of water in a dessert, packaged adorably, for the parched soul who has not been drinking the living water that her father has been offering her this whole time. The woman who has been neglecting the pursuit of finding her truest happiness in Christ alone. The woman like me. We who have fallen limp in the hard days of motherhood. And her message feels like a saving grace. And we see it everywhere, in Target and on our friend’s social media page, and in our heart of hearts we know that it’s deception.
I watched the first three minutes of Rachel Hollis’ documentary on Prime and I thought about it for days until I could come back and watch the whole thing, alone. And I listened to her book on 1.5 speed on Blinkist (an app that gives the main points). I have read what other women have had to say, and so by-and-large I have thoroughly absorbed her core message. I’ve even laughed at some of her YouTube video tutorials.
Some of her advice is just shallow and immature, but when we are floundering our way through our own lives, who are we to judge? At least her stuff feels real, colorful, nicely made and relatable. And that is what keeps us coming back.
But some women do more than just come back.
Some eat this advice ravenously because Rachel is offering the message that we have been dying to hear. She has created a bridge for us Christian woman to essentially do the same things we have (half critically, half jealously), watched other women do for years, but have ourselves refrained from. She offers the voice and the permission to go after our dreams, live lavishly, pursue what we want, and maybe even sprinkle a little Jesus on top.
“Discernment is not knowing the difference between right and wrong, it is knowing the difference between right and almost right.” –Charles Spurgeon
These are the three areas I feel Rachel’s advice is most detrimental to women, and I’d also like to offer a godly alternative.
1. Drive forward- go after what you want.
This is a tricky, partial-truth, and one that we really need God’s word to slice through and divide joint and marrow, thoughts and attitudes of the heart. The way I see it is that this advice could be used for those times when we are delaying obedience to God or being downright disobedient to something God has made clear to us. Maybe we should be taking better care of our bodies. There is no time like the present, and no amount of complaining that will get the same results as action. There is a time to act, to move, to push through things that are hard, that we know we ought to be doing.
But on a grander scale, Hollis talks about going after your dreams that you have for your life, making the time and pushing forward. But here is what I see: We don’t always know exactly what we want, or what it looks like to get it. Pushing forward in our own limited strength, with our own skewed sense of direction leaves us vulnerable to our own missteps, and often very quickly exasperated.
I am part of a large women’s writing guild, and I see this all the time: women who have a vision, or a general sense of where they want to get to, but get tangled up in other people’s advice on how to get there. We can wind up following formulas rather than the one true God. Very few women know exactly what they want and how to go about getting it- and the ones who feel they do, are often very much mistaken about what this all will get them. A ticket to happiness this is not.
We need God to guide our steps and keep our priorities in line, period. Nothing else will “work”. Even if it looks like it’s working on Instagram.
2. Being pushy and pushing the important people away.
Pushing for your own way might get people to do what you want, but most will not like you.
In a day when people are screaming and shouting for their voices to be heard, climbing on each other’s backs for position- real affections are growing thin. Demanding your rights, speaking harshly, and being in-your-face, might make people cower down, but it will not fan the flame of affection or respect- especially with your spouse.
You might get everything that you think you want, but in the process, loose the affection and respect of those who are most important to you. Being brash does not get us all that we think it does. It leaves us hollow. There are priorities God calls us to as women, and if you need to brush up on these, read Titus 2. We should not push these people aside. Which leads me to #3…
3. The REAL, BEST things come from God.
Surrendering to Him and following His will was the biggest turning point in my life.
It flooded me with healing, peace and joy beyond what I knew possible. And can I share a secret? Now that I am older, have more possessions, a nicer house and stable income, I am no happier than I was when my soul was flourishing in Christ during harsh circumstances.
God is an equal opportunity employer when it comes to happiness. We hear it all the time and yet our soul still struggles to believe that we wouldn’t be happier if we had these earthly things that our (deceptive) hearts want more than anything.
“I may, I suppose, regard myself, or pass for being, as a relatively successful man. People occasionally stare at me in the streets–that’s fame. I can fairly easily earn enough to qualify for admission to the higher slopes of the Internal Revenue–that’s success. Furnished with money and a little fame even the elderly, if they care to, may partake of trendy diversions– that’s pleasure. It might happen once in a while that something I said or wrote was sufficiently heeded for me to persuade myself that it represented a serious impact on our time–that’s fulfillment. Yet I say to you — and I beg you to believe me–multiply these tiny triumphs by a million, add them all together, and they are nothing–less than nothing, a positive impediment–measured against one draught of that living water Christ offers to the spiritually thirsty, irrespective of who or what they are.”
– Malcolm Muggeridge
Seek God first, sweet friend. He offers you everything you need.
I am there with you getting caught up at times wanting to be the woman in high-waisted jeans with the perfect top-knot, with a crap-load of adoring followers.
But deep down I know it is better to be the truly surrendered woman with the warm smile. The present woman who is available to talk with and pray with the people in my life around me. The real woman who can relate with feeling put-under by a constant parade of perfection on Instagram. Let’s not be the women burning ourselves out on the treadmill of our own self-made plans for perfection. Making an idol of all the wrong things.
I’m going to keep striving after Jesus, even if that means I grow impatient because this article might take me three days to write and publish because I will go upstairs to my husband who I know doesn’t sleep well without me beside him. I will choose to believe God’s priority for me as a wife over a writer. Because I’ve seen His goodness in the land of the living, and the beauty in the sacrificial, the little, the small, the humble.
The spark that comes into our eyes when we do the things that are hard and take work, not to be noticed, but rather because it is what God tells us- and we are putting our stock in eternity with Him. Not here, for ourselves.
When we are so tempted to put ourselves first, get swayed by celebrity Instagrams, or are dying to follow Rachel Hollis’ advice, it should be a sobering reminder that we are in desperate need of the love of our savior.
We need time with him. We need to be on our face praying and resting in his promise.
He has the way to happiness. The way to exalt the humble and humble those who exalt themselves.
Let’s not be the women weighed down by your own sin and thus swayed by all kinds of evil desires. If you are not joyful and content in Jesus, go to Him daily, beg, ask Him, and study His word. There is nothing new that is better than the simplicity of the gospel, and nothing better for you as a woman than adhering to God’s priorities.
Cling to Him, dear one. It is so much better than the deception flashing in front of your eyes.
“Whoever sows to please their flesh, from the flesh will reap destruction; whoever sows to please the Spirit, from the Spirit will reap eternal life.”- Galatians 6:8
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Healing Your ♥ When Your Family of Origin was Broken by Divorce
A FREE 7-DAY E-MAIL COURSE TO HELP YOU:
Identify deeply-rooted issues from your broken past
Find peace and trust as you allow God to surface these issues
Continually walk toward a full healing
Flourish in your marriage and home
Step out of old, ingrained thought-patterns and into the woman you were created to be!
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How to Stop Gravitating Toward Losers and Be More Selective in Who You Get Close To
First of all, I realize the title of this article is not very nice.
I’m the kind of person who never says words like “loser”. I’m an equal opportunity employer- rich, poor, fat, skinny, annoying- everyone deserves respect and kindness as far as I’m concerned.
My husband, not so much.
He has a quick radar for all things “loserish”. He was raised in a much more socially-conscious environment than I was. He’s a snob, basically.
But what I admire about his shrewdness is that
First of all, I realize the title of this article is not very nice.
I’m the kind of person who never says words like “loser”. I’m an equal opportunity employer- rich, poor, fat, skinny, annoying- everyone deserves respect and kindness as far as I’m concerned.
My husband, not so much.
He has a quick radar for all things “loserish”. He was raised in a much more socially-conscious environment than I was. He’s a snob, basically.
But what I admire about his shrewdness is that he never seems to get entangled in unhealthy or draining relationships because he can spot a toxic or needy person a mile away, and will not throw an ounce of his care or energy in their direction.
He shuts it down quickly.
And I’m over here just trying to make everyone feel comfortable and loved. But deep down I’m like…
But all jokes aside, I know that we balance each other out and there are so many ways that God has used me to soften his edges, and him mine.
For me, learning to put up the right boundaries with people has taken some work- but it has been more than worth-while.
Learning how to NOT be drained by toxic, unhealthy or needy people, allows you the space and breathing room to focus on (and do a good job with) what matters.
Here are four amazing resources, depending on your unique situation:
1. I have a toxic boyfriend.
If you are an unmarried woman who has been on an emotional roller-coaster with the same guy for a while- please check out this 40 day journey to healing and freedom!
2. My family-of-origin was broken by divorce.
If you are now a mom and wife but suspect some of your struggles come from your broken family-of-origin, this is a brand new FREE e-email course I just put out. The content is so rich and specific for those of us who came from broken families, you might find you understand certain things about yourself for the very first time!
3. I’m beyond discouraged and angry with my husband.
Enough said. If that’s you- this is a great resource! Or, if you could really use someone to talk to about these issues, please check out my new Vent & Pray Sessions!
4. I need better, healthier friendships
This was a long time struggle of mine. It’s time to create healthy, give-and-take friendships with people who don’t suck the emotional life out of you. Read this.
5. Really, Instagram just makes me feel like a loser
Haha, I’ve been there, girl! Let’s try to help you find some healthy perspective!
I hope these resources will bless you on your journey to finding more balance and boundaries with people!
Healing Your ♥ When Your Family of Origin was Broken by Divorce
A FREE 7-DAY E-MAIL COURSE TO HELP YOU:
Identify deeply-rooted issues from your broken past
Find peace and trust as you allow God to surface these issues
Continually walk toward a full healing
Flourish in your marriage and home
Step out of old, ingrained thought-patterns and into the woman you were created to be!
This is a personal writing project meant to express my feelings and thoughts, not to be used in place of God’s word. Anything good and true that I write is only because he has blessed and gifted me to do so, but I am a sinner, saved by grace, and am prone to weakness, bias, harshness and fault. I hope that my words can lead you to seek more of your own personal walk with Christ, because HE is only place you will find real TRUTH and satisfaction.