This might be hard.
This right here is where someone might be tempted to peel away and go follow the advice of some other coach or mogul who doesn’t insist on keeping God first.
But if you are reading this, I’m banking on the fact that you want to do this thing RIGHT.
In my own life, I adhere to this list of priorities:
God
My husband and children (and their schooling and activities)
My health
My home (and dog *roll eyes)
My ministry (my writing as well as coming alongside my husband to help him minister as a soccer coach and role-model)
A little bit of time with extended family and friends
Anything extra! (Hint: usually there is no time for anything extra)
My relationship with God is paramount and I make sure to take time to talk to him and read his word every morning.
After my morning quiet time, I do a very quick bit of exercise, shower, get ready, and wake my children up with enough time to have breakfast and get out the door without rushing (at least not insanely rushing:-). My oldest two attend a Christian School and my younger two are mostly home with me.
I keep our schedule very clear of clutter (we say no to pretty much everything), so we can lead balanced and leisurely lives that are centered around home. I’ve also had to prioritize keeping my phone away, because I want to be mentally and emotionally present in my home for my husband and kids.
I like being the house that my kids’ friends come over to, and I like the peaceful unhurried rhythm of not over-scheduling.
The majority of my ministry work takes place during my little boys’ 2.5 hour daily nap.
THAT IS WHEN I DO MY WRITING AND ONLINE MINISTRY.
I work for about two hours every weekday, and maybe for a few hours on a Saturday at a coffee shop every few weeks. That’s not a whole lot of time!
But, I am purposeful to get done the other things that come before this, SO THAT I CAN HAVE THIS TIME. Because the truth is I LOVE DOING THIS! It is my passion. And when you have a passion you are willing to make sacrifices for it.
Here are some things that I sacrifice in order to do this kind of work:
I don’t have social media (except using Pinterest as part of my blog).
I don’t spend idol time on my phone (of course every now and then I catch myself wasting time on my phone, but I’ve gotten quicker to put it down as soon as I realize I’m doing it!)
I don’t watch TV or movies during the day. Several times a week my husband and I will snuggle up on the coach at night for a movie or show, but that’s it for me.
My house is not at the uber-perfect, super-clean level I use to demand. (It is clean and picked up, but I’ve gotten more relaxed and realistic. I no longer spend a full day every week cleaning behind toilets and dusting every square inch like I use to).
You see, you only have time for so much in your life.
There is no way to do a good job being a wife, a mom, work full time, clean your house, keep up with all of your friends, eat healthy, meal plan, look at instagram, watch TV, be in perfect shape, and run your own successful business all at the same time.
You have to chose a few things that you want to do REALLY well, and the rest, no matter how good and worthy of your time, will have to land by the wayside.
YOU CAN ONLY DO A FEW THINGS WELL.
And here is the mistake that I see so many women in business making:
They skim their time from the top (the important things), instead of skimming it from the bottom (the less important things).
They decide against being present in their home, with their husband and children- the very things that the Bible (in Titus2) tell us are important for a woman. In fact, many women use their work or ministry as an escape from home life. And we can all understand why (because our calling as moms and wives is HARD!)
I’ve seen women try to pursue a dream while their marriage and home-life are a mess. And I want to ever so gently ask: If you, as a woman, are not pursuing God’s priorities for women, what do you really think you have to offer to other women?
Again, not that you are expected by God to be perfect in your home and marriage, but it is insane to me that most mainstream Christian ministries, books, sermons, blog-posts, are just completely leaving out, I mean like NOT EVEN TALKING ABOUT God’s most important callings on a women’s life! Being a daughter of Jesus, being a GOOD wife and a present and loving mother.
So all of that to say- There will be an abundance of material, books, voices, blog posts, etc. telling you to just GO FOR IT!! Do you! Sacrifice what needs to be sacrificed to make your dreams happen!
And there will be a lot of appealing partial-truths that temp you to bite into lies (it’s happening to all of us women!)
But be steadfast, and keep Jesus first, girlfriend.
Because there is NOTHING IN THE WORLD like God’s favor and blessing on your life, marriage, home and work. It’s EVERYTHING!
And everything else, no matter how glittery on the outside, is sheer emptiness.
Don’t be fooled.
Now please don’t misunderstand what I’m saying. I know that for financial and circumstantial reasons, women often have to work outside their homes, often even full time doing something they dislike. That is just reality sometime. But as much as we are able, I believe that God calls us to have our heart anchored at home (and anchoring our home!) We are the women! If we aren’t going to be the warmth, the tenderness and the light in our home, who is?
We are the ones who make the home…home!
Again, not that you have to have a perfect marriage or be a perfect parent- far from it. It is simply about surrendering to Jesus and his priorities for you as a woman and continuing to put them in the right order.
